Saturday, June 29, 2013


I'm still finding myself in this big, bad world. I've made so many mistakes, failed a thousand times and picked myself up again. But I really haven't started living my life yet. The things I have done don't even begin to measure up to the things I could do. I'm destined for more, I just know it. I'm not just an average girl. I've got some purpose in this life of mine, I just need to find it. 
People will push me down every second of every day but I won't give up. It may seem like I'm losing but I believe there is no end game. Yes we have a fate that's written by the gods and I know they planned something great for us and I'll find it. My purpose, my goal. Whatever it is. Life may throw a thousand things at me and I may not be ready but I'll learn from every mistake I make and fight to become better. Someday, I'll  hold my head up high and be able to say "I'm proud of what I am". Until that day, I won't stop running, I won't stop fighting. I'm still rising.

Saturday, June 22, 2013

A trip to the Zoo!

I went to the zoo today. It was raining.I lost my Itouch. Most of my high school mates hate me.
Terrific huh?

Well, the zoo. Around 12 people. 7 teenagers and 5 adults. The day started off great! With all us crazy kids crammed in a car heading to the zoo. Everything was cool, until a crazy cop stopped us because 'the license plate font wasn't
 appropriate'. Like seriously? He wanted 2,000. My brother (cousin) somehow managed to lower it to a 100 and we got out of there as fast as we could as he mumbled 'I can't even buy a kilo of tomatoes with this'. 
See, the last time I went to this particular zoo was nearly 10 years ago with my family. So me and my brother whip out our cameras and start snapping. About 10 minutes in, we were already bored of taking pictures of monkeys. We ended up going on the jungle safari during which the bus driver had an intense desire to speed up at curves making me think I was either going to die from the bus crashing or the lions finding me later.
We managed to have a lot of fun throughout the day.
And then, it starts raining.
Ugh. Let me just say, I hate rain. Okay, some times I'm all 'Rainbows and Butterflies. Ooooh Rain! *yaay*'. But mostly I'm like, 'Rain. Death. I hate my life. Let's just die.' Today, it was pouring! Instead of getting back in the car like the adults, we decided we couldn't go home until we saw the crocodiles. By the time we found the crocs we were completely drenched and extremely tired. Only to find the stupid crocodiles wouldn't even bob up to the surface of the water so we  could get a good look at them. Such a disappointment. *sad face*
We ran back to the cars shivering and cold. With the heat on full blast, we left to our respective homes. *sigh*
Halfway back home, I realize that my Itouch isn't in my pocket anymore! Long story, short, I lost it. It wasn't in any of the cars or accidentally chucked into someone's bag. I LOST IT. My guess is that I dropped it in the zoo while it was raining. Nevertheless, it's gone.
My itouch is literally my life. It has every single picture I have taken for the last 4 years; all my memories, my school days, my friends, EVERYTHING!. All of my music is in there and I can't survive without music! Tears and Sadness. Bleh. I hate myself. 

Oh and my high school mates. I'll get into that later.

P.S.- Brother= Cousin.I don't have any own brothers.
P.P.S.- I'll upload pictures from my trip soon. :)


Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Chocos are my designated late night snacks.

As everyone is lost in sweet slumber, I lay awake. The pitter patter of my fingers racing across the keyboard instills a sort of eeriness. To numb out the sound, I play some music. 
I pull my knees up towards myself and wrap my hands around my legs. Melodies play into my eardrums. As I bring my forehead forward to rest upon my knee, I feel goosebumps running down my back. In moments like this, I feel so alone. Like I'm the only person in the entire world. My bright red phone  lies next to my foot. Is it dead? Not a single call. Not a single text. The instant this thought enters my mind, I can feel the bed vibrate. A message. Who could it be? Airtel? Pet store? *Sigh*
:) Oh it's you. I've used the word best friend so often but it never actually applied to any of them. But you truly are my best friend. You are one of the very few people that listen to my silly problems and one of the few that I trust. I hope we never stop talking because I consider you as family. 

The dull light from the light bulb manages to fill a small area of the room in an orange tint. I trace the goosebumps along my arms as I glance up at the ceiling. If I could just reach up to the heavens. My hands become numb as I sit still. I try to get sensation back as I fling my hands back and forth. Pain shoots through my right arm and wrist. I guess I still haven't fully recovered from the accident. I wet my dehydrated lips as I look for my chapstick. The smell of shampoo still lingers in my hair. Flowery. 

'You're from the seventies but I'm a 90's kid'- Icona Pop

All of a sudden, I feel like dancing. With my hands raised above my head, my body swaying to the music, my lips manage a small smile.  
A yawn escapes my mouth and water forms in my eyes. Guess I'm sleepier than I thought. The percussion keeps me awake for now. Who needs drugs when you have music. This guy I know always said that he had a feeling that I'm one of the few girls he knows who'd probably look good headbanging to music. I don't know about him but I find that hard to believe. But that doesn't stop me now. No one can see me. I'm really getting used to being alone. I hope I learn to like it soon enough. 
A teddy bear stares at me dead in the eye questioning me with it's beady (literally) little brown eyes. I stare back  for a few seconds. Since I was a little girl, if I kept a teddy next to me as I was falling asleep, it would always end up on the floor a couple of feet away from the bed. Guess we don't get along. 

'Insanity why are you my clarity?'- Zedd

Good Night. :)

Monday, June 17, 2013

Survey TIME!

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?  Damn.  sings *I can't change, even if I try*
2. When is the next time you will have sex? I believe in Chastity. I don't need to say more. 
3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR"? Chore, core, snore, bore, four, gore, more, pore.
4. Favorite planet? Pluto. I know it's not a planet anymore! If you won't accept pluto, then venus. 
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your mobile? My mom. 
6. What is your favorite ring on your phone? 'Pika Pika. Pika Pika. Pika Pika. Pika PII. Pikachu Pikaaa.' and 'I'm a gummy bear'. I absolutely love the way people look at me when they hear my phone ringing. 

7. What shirt are you wearing? It says, "I'm a morning person."
8. Do you "label" yourself? I label myself as a weird individual.
9. Name the brand of shoes you're currently wearing? Invisible ones. I'm not wearing any.
10. Bright or Dark Room? In between? Like bright. ish. 
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you? He's pretty damn funny.
12. If you're alone in a room with two beds, which one do you sleep on? The one closest to the air conditioner.
13. What were you doing at midnight last night? Blogging!
14. What did your last text message you received on your mobile say? "Hey dude call me in the morning, when you are free. We gotta talk. Night :)"
5. Where is your letter box? Like a mail box? Don't have one.
16. What's a word that you say a lot? I used to say 'duh' a lot but I've forced myself to stop.  Now I say 'abba cha'  and 'abbo' a lot.
17.Who told you he/she loved you last? This junior of mine said he loves me just now. So cute. ^_^ 
18. Last furry thing you touched? Teddy bear on my bed
19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days? I took an Azithromycin tablet the other day. 
20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed? WUT.
21. Favorite age you have been so far? 16
22. Your worst enemy? I don't think I have one. Not that no one hates me! Oh, tons of people hate me. I just don't really care about them. 
23. What is your current desk top picture? It's just black. Completely black.
24. What was the last thing you said to someone? Since when have you had super hearing?
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly, which would you take? I'd like to be able to fly. 
26. Do you like someone? Nope. 
27. The last song you listened to? Thrift Shop
28. If the last person you spoke to was getting shot at, would you jump in front of the bullet? Yes
29. If you could punch 1 person in the face who's in your life right now, who would it be? No one really. 
30. What is the closest object to your left foot? A pair of jeans.

I lied. Fathers.

Ok. Yes. I know. I'm posting on the same day. *GASP* If you actually noticed that, give yourself a pat on the back for having nothing better to do!

In the last post I said I wouldn't talk about fathers even though it was father's day (even though I uploaded that half-an-hour late). Well, now it's not father's day anymore!

Dad, father, papa, daddy. We call him by so many names. The head of the family; in most households. (Yay for stereotypes?). Since you were a baby, he was fascinated with the idea of you. He was so eager for you to grow up, to show you the world and what it holds in store for us. He would sit you down on his knee to tie your shoe laces. *make a bow and then knot it*
How was it that when you tied them, they literally couldn't come undone for the whole day, but when I did, they would loosen up in minutes? 
Every morning, you would open the car door and gesture me inside. I felt so special! On my way home, you would ask me about my day. Every day. God, I used to get so annoyed on the days that weren't so good. But you never forgot. Now I understand that you cared about what I had to say. Thank you for that. I hated those long hours you made me get up early in the morning to teach me maths. But I had no idea how much it'd help me. Now I do. The first time you told me about the Fibonacci series, I thought you were speaking alien. Now, it just seems so easy. Sometimes I would tell you the answer and you'd say it was wrong. I would go over the problem multiple times but I would still get the same answer. You confused me so often. That was your way of teaching me to answer confidently. I can't say that I learned from it, but I am working on my confidence. Thanks for giving me the little nudge I needed dad. I can't even explain the joy I felt that day when you got the mathematics problem wrong and I got it right. I loved the way that you just wouldn't accept defeat. But I knew! I gloated a lot. I remember staying up late at night with you to watch scary movies even when mom told me to go to sleep. I always got scared, no matter how stupid the movie was. You would always reassure me saying, "You don't need to be afraid of ghosts, I am the king of ghosts!" I never believed you and thought you to be delusional (just kidding) but I really did appreciate the thought. (Deep for a 9 year old).
P.S. I will never forget the time you accidentally put salt instead of sugar in my milk. I drank about half of it before I told mom because I didn't want to make you feel bad. God, I almost threw up that day. Nevermind! 

Now we're separated by oceans and you still manage to call me every day. My shoelaces still come undone, I open my own car door, I tell mom about my day; even if she doesn't ask, I still suck at maths (sorry, but I'm trying. Just being honest!) and scary movies still scare me.
Thank you Dad, for always being there for me. I miss your weird little dances! 


Read this. I dare you.

Happy Father's Day! :)
Nope, this post isn't going to about father's day! So, at ease gentlefolk! 

I tried to start a video blog type thing the other day. Let me just say, WHAT AN EPIC FAIL. I absolutely hate the way I look on camera, my accent sounds so mean-girl-like. *cries* I had no idea I could be so retarded. Hopefully, I'm not like that all the time. If I am, I totally understand why I don't have friends now.  After about three retakes, I gave up. I still have the footage and I have no idea how to edit it. Maybe I'll muster up the courage to actually put it out there one day. Or maybe, I'll do it if someone gives me a little nudge! *smiles* Anyone? ANY-ONE?! Ah forget it. *sigh* I'll probably just continue my life blogging to myself like this. Then one day, I'll show this blog to my kids (Because I don't think anyone else will be reading this in the near future) and they'll just be like, 'Wow, mom. You were weird.' Maybe then someone would be benefited from all this pointless mumbo jumbo. Ah what am I saying, I'll just end up forcing one of my poor little friends (and let me say there aren't that many) to read all this stuff one day.

Wow. I have just realized that this stuff sounds like some shitty 'Dear Diary' stuff. I'm ashamed.
No. Time for change! *GAME FACE*

Nah, too lazy. Maybe the next post. Teehee.

Oh darn, I forgot to post this yesterday. Nevertheless. *Belated Father's Day!

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Yeh Jawaani Hai Dewaani

Okay, first of all. Of my non-existent viewers if there are any who watch hindi movies, I suggest you to go watch 'Yeh Jawaani Hai Dewaani' RIGHT NOW! I'm watching it right now and it is bloody amazing. The characters are played out brilliantly and the story line progression is fantastic. Ah, I love it! 
It's the perfect summer movie.
Comedy; in all the right places

Romance; Adorable <3
Acting; Ranbir Kapoor- Uhm. Do I need to say anything? He was awesome as usual.
Deepika Padukone/Naina: Honestly, it seemed like she took the role of her counterpart in 'Cocktail'; Meera (Diana Penty) in this one. She played it out brilliantly. 
Everyone else was terrific. I don't really have the patience to blab about all that because I've got to get back to this movie! AGH!
#mustsee #bloodyamazing

SIDE NOTE: June 8th
Okay on that particular day, I felt like watching a really cheesy movie and somehow I found it.
The movie really isn't that bloody amazing. But it's watchable.